The bravery of being out of range

posted by Arkham on April 6th, 2010

Read this: http://collateralmurder.org/

Roger Waters – The bravery of being out of range

You have a natural tendency
To squeeze off a shot
You’re good fun at parties
You wear the right masks
You’re old but you still
Like a laugh in the locker room
You can’t abide change
You’re at home on the range

You opened your suitcase
Behind the old workings
To show off the magnum
You deafened the canyon
A comfort a friend
Only upstaged in the end
By the Uzi machine gun

Does the recoil remind you
Remind you of sex
Old man what the hell you gonna kill next
Old timer who you gonna kill next

I looked over Jordan and what did I see
Saw a U.S. Marine in a pile of debris
I swam in your pools
And lay under your palm trees
I looked in the eyes of the Indian
Who lay on the Federal Building steps

And through the range finder over the hill
I saw the front line boys popping their pills
Sick of the mess they find
On their desert stage
And the bravery of being out of range
Yeah the question is vexed

Old man what the hell you gonna kill next
Old timer who you gonna kill next

Hey bartender over here
Two more shots
And two more beers
Sir turn up the TV sound
The war has started on the ground

Just love those laser guided bombs
They’re really great
For righting wrongs
You hit the target
And win the game
From bars 3,000 miles away
3,000 miles away

We play the game
With the bravery of being out of range

We zap and maim
With the bravery of being out of range

We strafe the train
With the bravery of being out of range

We gain terrain
With the bravery of being out of range
With the bravery of being out of range

We play the game
With the bravery of being out of range

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Another Insurance Joke

posted by Arkham on April 7th, 2009

buy_life_insurance

I find life insurance jokes incredibly funny, probably because they mostly talk about people and their approach and expectations towards death.

Mary was discussing the various aspects and possible outcome of the insurance policy with the clerk at the Insurance Agency.

During the discussion, she asked: “Suppose I take the life insurance for my husband today and tomorrow he dies? What will I get?

The clerk eyed her suspiciously and replied, “Probably a life sentence.”

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If you wake up

posted by Arkham on April 6th, 2009

death_insurance

A life insurance agent named Michael was the top seller with his company for the sixth year and was about to retire. His best friend Scott went out with him for their last drink on company time.

Scott said, “Mike old boy, I’ve asked you the same question for the last six years, and you’ve always refused to answer. Now that you’re retiring, why not tell me your secret of how you sell so many life policies.”
“You’re right, Scott, I do have a secret, and I can’t think of a better person to tell it to.”
Rather excited, Scott blurted, “Well, what is it?”

Michael slowly lit his pipe and puffed on it until it was drawing good. He then put his face close to Scott’s and started his tale.
“First, when I’m telling him all the benefits about the policy, and how he should understand that it is his obligation to his family to protect them..”
“Yes, Mike, we all do that,” interjected Scott, “there’s nothing new that you’re telling me!”
“Don’t be so anxious, Scott, let me tell you in my own way.”
“Sorry, Mike..”

Mike’s voice became lower so that Scott had to strain his ears to hear above the bar noise. Then he continued.
“Now, all during my sales pitch I interrupt to ask the client if he feels OK. When he says yes, I look at him kinda funny, but I continue on, stopping every few minutes to either look intently at him or ask him if he would like a glass of water or something.”
“That sounds like an interesting approach,” mutters Scott. “Does it usually end up in a sale?”
“To be honest with you, not very often,” answers Mike. “But the next step works almost every time.”

“For God’s sake, Mike, stop playing with me. What is the next step?”
“Well, next I say ‘Don’t let me frighten you into making a hasty decision. Sleep on it tonight. IF you wake in the morning, give me a call then and let me know.'”

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Rick Wright R.I.P

posted by Arkham on September 23rd, 2008

A week ago, Richard William Wright died of an undisclosed form of cancer.

I was so sad.

I am still so sad.

Read the rest of this entry »

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