Funny Linux Errors
Just found these on Digg, and I will dig for more.
% cat “food in cans”
cat: can’t open food in cans% nice man woman
No manual entry for woman.% “How would you rate Bush’s incompetence?
Unmatched “.% Unmatched “.
Unmatched “.% [Where is Elvis Presley?
Missing ].% ^How did the sex change operation go?^
Modifier failed.% If I had a ( for every $ the politics spent, what would I have?
Too many (‘s.% make love
Make: Don’t know how to make love. Stop.% sleep with me
bad character% got a light?
No match.% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.% !:say, what is saccharine?
Bad substitute.% %blow
%blow: No such job.% (-
(-: Command not found.$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!
Psychological Help Line
Hello, welcome to the psychological help line.
If you’re obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are codependent, ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want; please do not hang up until we trace your call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a feeble voice will tell you which number to press.
Thank you.